Spritzing Howards

I've been rather hard on the product Febreze in the past because I believe it promotes OCD on several levels. It taps right into the germophobic aspect of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder & could very easily turn us into a nation of habitual sprayers, like Howard Hughes, Howie Mandel & Howard Stern.....all self-admitted victims of the mental malfunction & all named Howard. Coincidence? I think not, but that's up to the authorities to investigate. If you are related to, or know someone named Howard, observe them when they are unaware they are being watched. (I cannot do this, I have not one Howard in my life.) Do they carry around a bottle of antiseptic? Have they started to wear boxes of Kleenex as shoes? When you try to hug them, do they run to the nearest corner & collapse in a heap, screaming? If they show any of these symptoms, please report them to the National OCD Foundation, at their 800 number. At the prompt, press 3 to "report a Howard."

Okay, I got sidetracked with the Howard issue. I also feel that Febreze is creating a nation of chronic spritzers....those who don't feel safe & intrinsically fulfilled unless they are spritzing something. I can understand this manifestation of OCD because I have been spritzing so much lately that my right index finger aches. I have discovered Wishbone Salad Spritzers & they are wonderful. An amazing product, IT WALKS, IT TALKS, IT CRAWLS ON ITS BELLY LIKE A SNAKE..... okay, I made that up. It is good, though. Everyday I find another use for this yummy stuff. (I like the Balsamic Vinaigrette best) Today I found out that it really livens up a BLT. Yesterday I was spraying it all over my asparagus. It ain't just for salads, folks. One calorie per spritz, but that doesn't matter to me. It tastes so good that I would still be spraying if it was 10 calories a pop.

If you are burdened with the shame & annoyance that is OCD, at least sublimate those constant compulsions to spritz into something yummy. It won't kill the germs in your children's toy boxes, but it can really jazz up a slice of tomato.